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Modesty and Pride

by Bryan Bednarek

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    My very first collection of songs.
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1.
(You are amazed) I'm so unfazed by what has happened here You floatersby can't see clearly (I am so unfazed) As a result slamming doors, bags, and ringing of keys So absolutely no "what's done is done... it stays within the family" That's not my lifestyle At Christmas time you're so cliche Just stay the fuck away from me I don't want to lose you, stay dear to me
2.
Disobedience 02:31
3.
Reset me free and smooth out my lines Roll my heart down get another chance to fight I want this to be what it is in his mind's eye But don't go now never take me by surprise Set me back soon, let me learn to fly Push for the eyes to see what I need to find All is well now, I feel so free Fuck embarrassment? Move on? Fine by me Reset me free and smooth out these lines Roll me back down new scenarios in sight I want this to be what it was in my mind's eye Just take me now, I'm sick of these unforeseen skies Set me back down please, let me learn to fly Push for the soul to take what once was mine Please forgive, I repent, this is not what I had in mind My bowl was then full, now today I have to die Every time I reminisce I recede into my mind Imagine every time I missed and die a thousand times
4.
I'm in love with the world through the eyes of a girl Who's still around the morning after We broke up a month ago, I grew up, I didn't know I'd be around the morning after It's always been wait and see A happy day and then you pay And feel like shit the morning after But now I feel changed around and instead of falling down I'm standing up the morning after Situations get fucked up and turned around soon or later I could be another fool or an exception to the rule You tell me the morning after Crooked spin can't come to rest I'm damaged bad at best She'll decide what she wants I'll probably be the last to know No one says until it shows and you see how it is They want you or they don't Say yes I'm in love with the world through the eyes of a girl Who's still around the morning after
5.
Ailerons 04:11
Halfway through this heaven’s height No flashing lights confine my sight Preface of old snow Nauseous, head-rush, plug your nose Let’s go Miserable medium in your mind ‘cause clouds reflecting hurts our eyes I’d hold your hand, talk to you Shift your thoughts for primest view Singing to you, dear “Soon we’ll be so out of here” White darkness manifests reality Your breath on my ear is only in me Here is a wonderful place to be (I look around; you cannot be found) Such a beautiful way to see the reality (All I see are mountains’ faces) Of everything you want to leave (All I see are shadows’ clouds)
6.
7.
Thank You 03:23
Every time I think of you, it’s like I only just realize that you are gone. I wake up, again, and my mom tells me. Again, everything falls that’s within my body. We’re too sick to sleep, too scared to be lonely. I’m too afraid to believe that this can be easy. If I dare I’ll shut my eyes to spare my- self the torment of living without you. Then we’re standing all around you. We’re asking how we can all move on. Then we all hold hands and the tears start to fall. We were only one phase away; how can you be gone? Although it hasn’t been long I no longer lose sleep; because every day I still tell you everything. Lovely days breed peace of mind; I know I’ll see you again in due time. Then we’re standing there beside you. My hand on your heart, please, anything but to let go. Side-by-side we all hug and the tears start to fall. I cringe because this begins before we can crawl. We’re standing all around you. We’re standing there beside you. May it flow around you. I want to get this image out of my head but in its place I would find guilt instead. At the end of that day all I could say… All you could give was what you gave. All I could say was thank you, thank you.
8.
Progress 02:35
Tell me, Doctor was it worth all the school? Does it mean a single thing to you or does “Ph. D.” just sound really cool? Oh, Doctor won’t you teach me something new? Please don’t you let me make a fool of myself Have you seen all there is to see of this ocean deep, This salt free sea that so effectively lures me? (I am blind) Have you read all there is to read of this open sea? That sea that continues to so ruthlessly drown me Oh, Doctor all you have’s the will to rule No matter what you or I do, I’ll always make a fool of myself Everything I’ll ever foresee will be too good to be true Fuck you and your greedy state; still you will kid yourself everyday
9.

about

Created just after high school. I was filled with so, so much angst.

credits

released December 25, 2010

All tracks recorded, mixed, produced by Bryan Bednarek

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Bryan Bednarek Chicago, Illinois

I sometimes make music with my friends.

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